Feeling unhappy? This may be the reason why (Blog #29)

stressed out business women

This week, as I was reading away doing some research, which I’m always doing to make sure the blog posts I write for you contain kick-ass value, I came across some information that I just had to share.

If you’ve been following me for a while, you would’ve heard me on more than one occasion describe some people I’ve worked with as having ‘died inside’. Lost their soul, passion or any feelings of excitement that they once experienced because of doing a job they hate. And how that’s not what I want to happen to you, hence the reason behind my blog.

Sound familiar?

I’m sure it does.

Well, it turns out there is a proven reason behind why people start to show these signs when working in jobs they’re unhappy with. This comes from the work done by Dr Brené Brown, a researcher and professor from the University of Houston, USA.

You see, when we’re working away in a job we’re unhappy with, to get through the day you numb the emotions you don’t want to feel like fear, sadness, anger, disappointment, etc. But what Brown has proven is that we can’t selectively numb our emotions. We can’t choose which ones we want on or off. So when we’re numbing the bad ones, we’re unconsciously doing the same to the good ones such as happiness, gratitude, interest, love etc.

The overall result, you end up feeling bloody miserable. And this is why you hear of people needing that glass or two of wine after work, or that bottle of wine at the end of the week.

And like I’ve told you before, I know exactly what this is like. With the jobs that I’ve hated I’d put myself in work mood to get through the day. And I remember feeling so disinterested in anything that happened. By numbing the emotions that I needed to get through the day, to protect myself from getting insulted, belittled or frustrated, I also numbed the emotions that would create any kind of joy for me.

Something that I’ve seen way too many people in the corporate world go through. It’s the ones that say “It really doesn’t bother me anymore” while at the same time having this hollow stare like there’s simply no life left in them anymore. Well, now we know the reason why.

Blog Tip #29Check out Dr Brené Brown’s TED talk – The power of vulnerability. It’s worth 20 minutes of your time and you’ll develop a greater appreciation for making sure all your emotions are kept switched on.

What did you think about blog post #29?

Have you ever experienced this yourself? It could’ve been anywhere. At school or at a sports club.

Tell me about it by leaving a comment below.

 If you have any friends or colleagues that would benefit from this blog post – please share it!

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Talk to you next week.


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